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[voidgates]

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SUMMER ICARIAN ✦ FINAL FANTASY XIV (WoL OC)
RESIDENCE ✦ Residency
GEMBOND ✦ Ruby

"...ltros, what are you doing with that, put that down right now you little —"

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[basura_boi]

Mayhap.

[ There is so much he wants to say, suddenly, the words gathered so thick in his throat that he feels like he's choking on them. How he still wishes so desperately at times that he could get another view on things, but he can't because then there would be too many questions. How he tries to imagine what it would be like, all the time, and yet cannot form a clear vision because he doesn't know who he would be, had he never left home; not himself, any more, it almost feels like, though who the hell is he anyway?

He's so bloody lonely. And he didn't feel it, not like this, not before he came to this place and Aerith reminded him what it was like, a little, to have a family, and now Summer's talking to him like they might be friends and he doesn't know what to make of any of it.

Have all of his burdens passed, because he's dead? Maybe this is what the afterlife is actually like, and he's just overthinking it.

And of all things, that last is what's easiest to untangle and give voice to, ridiculously, an abrupt change of topic that doesn't feel abrupt to him because he can hear the screaming of his own thoughts. ]

D'ya think this is some kind of afterlife, here? Aerith says it's just another world of the sort people are taken to all the time, but she's also not from Eorzea.

[voidgates]

I was talking about my mate, for what it's worth. He has a habit of forgetting he has arms. Or thinking armless solutions are the right ones.

[This metaphor has gotten SO WEIRD.

But then he brings up the afterlife, and she actually stops still in her tracks at that, almost causing Ultros to smack into her ankles as he squishes and blurbles along behind. Because — she'd know, wouldn't she? She'd know because...because...]

I don't think so. I hope not.

[.................]

Who's Aerith?

[UH-OH.]

[basura_boi]

Think your mate'd be over it, aye? Since he ain't alone if he got you.

[ Though it's also a habit, he supposes.

Summer's reaction causes him to rethink what he asked, from a different angle. Too much in his own head, he supposes. Because if it were some kind of afterlife, then everyone would have to be dead, and... seems like Summer isn't. Aerith says she isn't. And for himself...

He still doesn't know how to think about it. He always thought being dead would be a relief, an end. And so far it hasn't been, but he has no one to talk that over with, either. ]

Ah... dumb thing to say. Pay me no mind.

[ ...oh shit. ]

My friend. Here. [ He looks away, shrugging. ]

[voidgates]

I think he'd cut his arms off for me if he had to.

[Scratch that. Now the metaphor has officially gotten SO WEIRD. Besides, pivoting to this talk of Ezar's friend is far, far more interesting.]

Well, you know what I'm going to ask about her already, don't you? Boots or arms?

[basura_boi]

[ Now you made it really weird, Summer. The look Ezar gives her is rather eloquent on that point. Though he still says. ]

And I'm glad for you in that, too.

[ Because even this weird shit is better than her asking about Aerith. Hells. ]

Dunno. Not been here but a month. But...

[ There are so many ways Summer reminds him rather eerily of Aerith, from her refusal to accept his sullen silences to the absolutely bizarre shit she says, seemingly at random.

But.

But Aerith has something she doesn't, through no fault of hers. Aerith called his soul, and he could not help but answer, because some things cannot be forgotten no matter how many years have passed. Aerith knows what it is to be hunted, to be at best a curiosity hiding in plain sight, to harbor secrets that people have killed and died for and run until exhaustion threatened to claim her.

She's a small echo of the home he's permanently lost. Someone his spirit knew was family long before he could admit to himself.

And he cannot possibly say any of these things to Summer, because it would open him to too many questions he can't answer. ]

Anyone laid a hand on her, I'd kill 'em. So... I suppose aye.

[ Easier for a soldier to put things in terms of violence. Let her read him as an overprotective male and nothing more. ]

[voidgates]

Hm. That seems to be a habit of yours, aye.

[And she doesn't press it, because she really has no reason to. Files the name away for later, maybe, just in case she should happen to meet someone by the name of Aerith around on happenstance, but he hardly has to spell out that pushing any further down this particular path will only put him on the defensive.]

Speaking of, are you still planning on making certain my mate doesn't beat me? Or have you mostly dropped that particular notion by now?

[basura_boi]

[ He gives her a rather arch look. ]

I recall you tellin' me 'tweren't none of my business.

[ And then very dryly: ]

'sides, be a fair challenge for a man with no arms to be beatin' you.

[voidgates]

[And just like that, before the sound of the words have even faded from the air, a bark of laughter coalesces into an extremely undignified snort, and Summer can't help but clasp a hand over her mouth, not actually to stifle the sound of her giggling but just to hide how broadly her lips have turned up while she does it.]

Or "booting" me, for that matter.

[She says, and dissolves into giggling again.]

what has this become

[basura_boi]

[ He snorts. ]

That was weak. You're gonna have to try harder making puns aboot that.

[ Deadpan. But his ears wiggle. ]