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[voidgates]

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TEXT ✧ AUDIO ✧ VIDEO ✧ ACTION

SUMMER ICARIAN ✦ FINAL FANTASY XIV (WoL OC)
RESIDENCE ✦ Residency
GEMBOND ✦ Ruby

"...ltros, what are you doing with that, put that down right now you little —"

INFO ✧ PERMISSIONS ✧ KINKLIST ✧ EXTRA

Comments

[basura_boi]

names are important

i think i

i was waiting for him to tell me it was all right

[voidgates]

were you worried that it was something just for me?

[basura_boi]

mayhap

i know it sounds stupid but

doesn't feel like something i should just

take

[voidgates]

it's not stupid
and if you told him so i think he would understand better than you know

he knows my name
he's the only person outside of my tribe who does
even obsidian and marcel don't

but even when we're alone he still calls me summer

do you WANT to call him raha?

[basura_boi]

hahaha considering the two of us feels fair strange to be calling someone their actual name doesn't it

i feel like if i told him he'd just say oh of course all enthusiastic because then i'd have asked and

there's nothing wrong with that but asking someone feels different from them asking you maybe

like you could have asked him to marry you but you wanted him to ask you

though i am not saying this is such an important matter

so maybe? i don't know

i'd call him that if he wanted me to and i think it'd feel... good? that's not the right word. i don't have a big enough word. maybe the closest is satisfying to the spirit but that isn't right either.

but i've also already... taken a lot of things for myself lately it feels

[voidgates]

i think you should tell him that you want something special to call him
and then ask him to choose for you
let him decide

let him give something to you and then it won't feel like taking

[basura_boi]

[ It's a relief, actually, that Summer had understood what he meant by taking things. ]

i will think it over but you are probably right. you normally are about this kind of stuff.

[ ... ]

do you think i should tell him my name

[voidgates]

i'm normally right about most things

but
do you mean, if it were me, would i tell him my name in your place?

[basura_boi]

wouldn't go that far, my beloved exploder of apples

maybe?

i told you my name because... it felt right to do at the time and i do not regret it. though if i hadn't then, i would be duty-bound to tell you anyway now.

[voidgates]

MAYBE THE APPLES DESERVED TO BE EXPLODED

um
wait
what do you mean duty-bound

[basura_boi]

i disbelieve that any apple has ever been so wicked as to deserve to be exploded :P

well

i'm one of your chosen mates aye

means you need to know what clan i'm from and who my mother was

... you're not obligated to want a child off me or any such thing! that's your choice. but you've still the right to know aye

[voidgates]

hnnn i don't remember that much about how keepers do it
i'm sorry

ezar is your mother's name, aye?
the way that female seekers take their father's
and then it has your birth order on it

but then the name that comes after it is your own

is that how it works?

[basura_boi]

sorry hah shouldn't have expected you to know, there aren't that many of us left

aye so
ezar'a means i'm her first son (was the only son actually)

no the name that comes after is the clan name

so i'm the first son of ezar of the malku clan.

probably didn't recognize the clan name as my clan was very small even... before the calamity. and we didn't deal with outsiders if we could help it.

[ It feels... weird to be talking about this. But it's information Summer needs to understand, and... maybe it's all right. He does want Summer and G'raha to know these things so they can remember when he's gone. ]

[voidgates]

wait...

but then
where's your name

that all says where you're from and who you're related to
but where does your name go

[basura_boi]

that is my name

i'm ezar of the malku clan's first son

that's my name

what else would you need to know?

[voidgates]

your NAME
where's the part of it that makes you YOU

raha is a tia of the g tribe
that's why his name is g'raha tia

his name is raha
if he was from the m tribe his name would be m'raha
if he were a nunh he would be g'raha nunh

but he has a name and his name is raha

why don't you have a name
do keepers not give their sons names???

[basura_boi]

i

what

i know that seekers do it differently

cause i guess you don't need to know who someone's mother is???? but i thought maybe that's because there are so many of you? or maybe men get their own names cause you got that tia/nunh thing that doesn't make any fucking sense

but

uh

why would i have a third name?

that'd just

make it harder for the matriarchs to know lineage wouldn't it?

[voidgates]

FEMALE SEEKERS HAVE NAMES TOO

one of my friends is y'shtola rhul

her name is shtola
she is from the y tribe
and her father is rhul

she has a sister named mhitra
who is also from the y tribe
whose father is also rhul

y'mhitra rhul

they are sisters
shtola and mhitra

WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A NAME

[basura_boi]

i do have a name i told you what it is!!!!

i would have been given a men's name if i'd been sent off to live with the other men but i wasn't so i don't

would you be happier with that????

[voidgates]

you mean your name really is rolanberry

because it's the first name that anyone gave you

[basura_boi]

fuck

[voidgates]

we're getting raha to give you a name

you deserve one
we're not calling you FIRST SON OF YOUR MOTHER anymore

[basura_boi]

...i guess if anyone's giving me a men's name it ought to be him since at least

if i'm his mate that counts as clan???

but

i feel like i ought to be insulted on my mother's behalf now a little

not that i was much good as a son

but

you haven't been calling Ezar's first son either

you've just been calling me by her name

[voidgates]

rolanberry stop
don't turn this into another of those things where you act like you don't have something because you don't deserve it

i'm not mad at your mother or your clan or even at keepers in general really

it's just
your name is something that should be most yours
more yours than anything else
not just who you are in relation to someone else

what if i told you that you couldn't call me summer anymore
or starshine
or love
or anything

what if all those names were taken away and i was just
desch's youngest daughter
and nothing else

do you really mean to say that wouldn't bother you even a little?

[basura_boi]

no that's not what i meant at all

me being a bad son is... a different thing we don't need to get into

i'm actually still angry at my mother sometimes because she kept me in her house. i wish she had sent me to live with the men. i think things would have been very different but that also isn't how it worked out and... i am trying to let it go but it's complicated

but it is not that i feel i don't "deserve" a men's name that is a very weird way to put it? i just don't have one because the men never gave me one because i lived with my mother until i ran away from my clan

and it was not the best idea that i used my mother's name when i signed on with the maelstrom but i panicked and couldn't think of another name to give at the time and then it was too late so i just have to hope i have not... dishonored her name by what i've done since

and with the question you asked

...yes, i would be upset if someone took all your names away and said that had to be your name now because i know that would upset you

though i would still always know you whatever name you had because you are you and you are beautiful

but that is not the situation here i think

i never had other names to be taken away

being "ezar rhiki" was a name i always knew was a shield because it protected my clan name and that protected me. i'm very used to everyone just calling me 'ezar' because that is the only name they have ever known me by but i also always remember it is my mother's name because it isn't as if i could forget

you can still call me rolanberry or whatever you like

it's just kind of funny that rolanberry is the first name i've ever been given that isn't to do with my mother or my clan